Coping with Grief

After Funeral Care

As we learn to cope with our loss and adjust to a changed situation, we may go through many changes of feelings, thoughts and behaviours. We may even question our spiritual beliefs. This is grief in action. There are no right or wrong ways to grieve and feelings of loss do not stick to a rigid timetable. Everyone reacts differently and will come to terms with loss in their own time.

​However, there are some reactions to death and dying that are common to many people. These reactions may include sadness, depression, anger, guilt, regret, thoughts of why me?, resentment, poor concentration and/or withdrawal from social activities.

As you make your way through the grief process and need understanding and information, you may seek assistance. Be patient with yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Consider talking to a friend who will listen without judgement or write in a private journal to express your feelings.

Caring for yourself is perhaps one of the most difficult things for us to do. Often we are busy and worried about how other people are coping and put off looking after ourselves. The process of our grief is unique to us, because our relationship with the deceased is personal and making meaning of this loss may be complex, bewildering and painful. It will take time to adjust to life without them.

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Coping after the funeral

It is important to understand the various experiences of grief. Each person has his or her own timetable and his or her own style of grief. You may struggle with several feelings at the same time. The depth and duration of each experience is different for everyone. You may experience a feeling briefly, intermittently or struggle with it daily. Understanding the various phases helps you to cope. Knowing that others have gone through this pain and have eventually been able to reinvest themselves in life gives one a sense of hope. It is important to reach out to close relatives, friends and professionals for the help, support and comfort you need.